Now all us girls know those things that we have to go through as women that make you go....ugh. Not screaming at the top of your lungs, not running around like a crazy woman; you just want to say ugh. I had one of those experiences yesterday.
I had to have one of those minor "female procedures" done and I really, really hate those. So much so, I didn't even see my lovely ob/gyn doc for about 5 years. I mean, hey, if it ain't broke, don't fix it, right? I get all undressed from the waist down, get into those lovely stirrups waiting for the doc to start the procedure. He gets everything in place and then pops up from under the paper drape across my legs and says, "See any good movies lately?"!! I wanted to die! I said, "yeah, it's called Count the Ceiling Tiles and I saw another one called Paint the Ceiling Beige". You'd think that Gynos would know by now that women don't want to talk while you're prowling around down there! It's hard for me to concentrate on your prattling on while I've got instruments hanging out of me!!
When we scheduled this procedure, I knew from previous experience that it could be pretty painful, so I ask for meds up front. Doc says just take some Advil. Umm, I can't take Advil, it's a NSAID and it will make what's left of my stomach disintergrate. He says, ok I'll give you some Lortab. Oh how my eyes light up! Much like that small child when they enter the candy store! Then I get to the pharmacy and the dickhead only gave me 2 pills! You'd think I was a freaking junkie trying to get dope!!! I know from past experience 2 will bearly cut it as one dose. Guess I'll have to supplement with some sort of Old Lady Pills from my mom.
My husband was so great. He bearly knows the tip of how the female plumbing works but took me to my appointment nonetheless. Even squired me to dinner afterwards. It's pretty fun trying to eat in a restaurant with a Lortab buzz!
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